looking for the third person and losing it

came into work this morning to find stuff strewn about my desk. binder clips, rubber bands, paper clips – all over the place. annoyed me somewhat that whoever used my space didn’t bother to clean up. then i log into the comp and see that the last person at my station was one of the nice, younger guys in the office. and instantly, just like that, all was forgiven. suddenly the messy leavings didn’t bother me and even seemed….rather amusing.

that’s my personal double-standard sexism at work for ya.

brain is rather fried from working so much on the comic-con report. text swims on screen now and the headache from yesterday morning has not faded; a particular throbbing behind the left ear. ugh. i stress the inconsequential too much. going to post office, sending out greeting cards, finding school parking, cleaning my desk, finishing personal projects…..on and on and on. now that i'm down from the frantic high of the previous week, stuff is dragging me down into the emotional dumps again. couldn’t get up to get ready for work this morning. for the first time in forever the alarm rang and rang and i was still in the middle of my dream where i was harry potter fighting a huge, hairy spider -- and the alarm was part of my dream and thus didn’t wake me up. [TOO much imagination sometimes.]

already fried brain means massive frustration at friends who won’t stop their campaign to stop me from quitting this job. VERY ANNOYED that they won’t leave me alone. VERY ANNOYED is an understatement even. this whole thing’s making me want to go to the bathroom and take a dump. literally. how many events actually work to hasten my bowel movements i ask you?!? i don’t get it. i'm really not that cool. i wish people’d stop thinking they need me and leave me to my own screwy existence.

the straight perm is growing out again. top part of my hair (around the forehead area) curves a la sissy spacek’s hair in the carrie movie. that slight bend bugs me…i like my hair to be all straight, all the time. this is how the inconsequential messes with my head.